D/HH Infusion
What “Uni-” Means to Me
By Lynette Hernandez, Illinois H&V
Think of any word that has the prefix uni. Now think of their meaning. Unicorn; a mythical horse with one horn. Unicycle; a bike with only one wheel. Unified; made as one. I am a 16-year-old girl and I have unilateral hearing loss.
When I was 4, I failed my preschool hearing test, and my parents took me to an audiologist. It was determined that I have unilateral hearing loss. Many doctors seem to think that my hearing loss was due to intensely high fevers I had as a child. I didn’t start using hearing devices until second grade. That year, my parents and I decided that an FM System would be the best thing for me. From second to fifth grade, I wore my FM System in school and gave the microphone from one teacher to another. In third grade, I had received my first pair of hearing aids through the Chicago Hearing Society. They were blue with purple and blue swirled molds. I never wanted to wear them in school because I didn’t feel responsible enough to have them on. So, once fifth grade rolled around, I felt like it was the perfect time to make the switch–and so I did. I started to wear my Cros hearing aids to school and ditched the FM System.
The switch naturally prompted questions from my classmates. For some reason, even though these kids had been a part of my life for the past six years, they somehow thought I needed my hearing aids to hear. Did I miss a fair amount of information said without a hearing device? Yes, of course, but that doesn’t mean I couldn’t hear at all–which my classmates knew. This was the first time I really felt like questioning why having unilateral hearing loss was such a hard concept for others to grasp.
Uni is a tricky prefix for me. It’s always made me confused. Having unilateral hearing loss means that I can only hear out of one ear. Or does it mean that I can’t hear out of one ear? The meaning switches–and that’s what bothers me. There’s a certain confinement in each way of explaining my hearing situation. When I say I can only hear out of one ear, that means I can still hear relatively well, making me feel as though people believe my hearing struggles aren’t valid. When I say that I can’t hear out of one ear, I suddenly feel as though people may pity me and actually believe that I struggle with my hearing.
Throughout my struggle attempting to navigate the balance between the hearing world and the deaf/hard of hearing community, I’ve learned something important–establishment. Establishing myself and voicing my struggles with friends, teachers, and classmates always made my internal struggle a little easier. I’ve always stood my ground so people don’t invalidate what I’m going through. I continue to make it clear that yes–I can still hear, and no–I’m not the same as you.
I’ve come to terms with the fact that I’m inevitably a part of both worlds. I’m always continuing to learn from the two and I think that as I get older, I am even more certain that I don’t have to pick one or the other. I can make the two worlds collide–I have been since my diagnosis. I just didn’t know it. It’s a beautiful revelation to have on your own and I’m so lucky that I get to be one of the many people handling this not-so-simple fight. ~
Editor’s note: The author is a teen on the Illinois Hands & Voices junior board. She is the daughter of Lydia Hernandez, Illinois Hands & Voices Vice President.